For Christmas my loving wife, who often complements my shaggy beard, got me the gift that keeps on giving by signing me up for the Dollar Shave Club. Why would this burly-bearded dude need a razor you ask? The answer might surprise you.
Although my scruffy beard is an untamed wilderness of whiskers, I like my neck to have a clean, baby bottom feel to it. Why? Because nothing else is more uncomfortable than a pimply, itchy, razor-burned neck that is peppered with stubble, and because…well, I’m vain and want to look damn fine for my woman.
I remember the days when I was just a young, Italian lad whose face was covered in more peach fuzz than the legs of his best bud. Ah yes, I was the envy of my sixth-grade classmates because I was the first to dabble in the ancient art of shaving. Even at a young age I was able to recognize the importance of selecting the right tools for the job. Unfortunately, my father’s single-bladed razor and cottage cheese looking shaving cream was all I had at my disposal. The result: a murder scene. My exceptionally handsome, chiseled facial features ended up covered in cuts, redness, and patches of missed stubble.
Over the years I’ve tried to find the right instruments (at an affordable price) to tame my manliness, but it seemed to be a futile endeavor. When I received my first shipment I was excited to see what new-age technology would be at my fingertips. As I hastily opened the contents of the box like Ralphie’s dad, I discovered a prize just as good as a leg lamp – The Executive.
What is The Executive you ask? Well sir, it is the best that money can buy if you want the cleanest, smoothest shave in the galaxy. What’s in the box you ask? (By the way, you ask a lot of questions that just so happen to lead this writing, I like that, it makes my job easier). The contents of the box include a handbook, a shave butter instruction sheet with shave butter, five blade cartridges (each cartridge having a whopping six blades), and the grippiest (is that a word?), sturdiest razor holder thingamado out there.
- The six-blade razor cartridges (most likely designed by a samurai) pack an impressive punch. They effortlessly cut through four-day-old stubble without leaving you a bloody mess.
- The shave butter does not foam making it easier to determine where to make the correct cuts when outlining your bead.
- The razor holder has as much grip as Antonio Brown’s palms making it impossible for your hand to slip off while shaving; therefore, you decrease your chances of making a poor cut.
- The price is exceptionally reasonable.
5. Timely shipping.
- The shave butter does the job, but you really need to be liberal when applying it. If not, you won’t get a smooth, comfortable shave.
- I’m being nitpicky here, but the razor holder is thick and heavy. Not light and nimble like I’m use to.
Overall, I’d highly recommend the Dollar Shave Club just look at these before and after pictures.
Consume. Review. Repeat. gives the Dollar Shave Club (https://www.dollarshaveclub.com) 9 out of 10 close shaves.